Watch out LeBron, the NBA is taking aim on a cast of star-studded complainers, Bud Shaw writes in his Sunday Spin.
Histrionics such as this one displayed by a certain ex-Cavalier during last spring's playoffs are supposedly on the NBA's hit list on improved decorum in 2010-11. But Bud Shaw is less than impressed by the idea or the likely execution.CLEVELAND, Ohio -- The people who hand out Emmy nominations are protesting this decision.
The NBA is giving refs more leeway in assessing technical fouls in hopes of dissuading player complaints. The league announced the expanded guidelines at the refs' annual meeting in Jersey City.
Reasons to "T" players in 2010-2011 include:
• Aggressive gestures, such as air punches;
• Running at officials to protest a call;
• Demonstrative disagreement, such as when a player incredulously raises his hands, or smacks his own arm to demonstrate how he was fouled;
• Excessive inquiries about a call, even in a civilized tone;
• Answering to the name "Rasheed" or "Wallace."
I made one of those up. You decide which.
Even with Wallace's planned retirement, the league believes fans are tired of watching all the gyrations. They're probably right, but the guidelines leave a lot of room for interpretation.
In addition, some of the best players in the NBA were near the top in technicals a season ago. So strict enforcement could hurt the product. Better they complain like Snookie during a power outage at the tanning salon than be sent to the showers early.
The Top Five Players Who Should Be Worried:
1) Dwight Howard. Second in the league a year ago with 16 technical fouls. Once assessed a delay-of-game tech for calling in Ben Matlock to defend him.
2) Kendrick Perkins. Also had 16 technicals. The wording "demonstrative disagreement" will be his bane just on the basis of the way he looks. Reacts to foul calls like a baby eating a lemon.
3) Kobe Bryant. Had 14 technicals last season. Argues everything. Cites GPS coordinates to prove he was nowhere near a fouled shooter. Almost makes you want to side with Joey Crawford. Almost.
4) Stephen Jackson. Just because.
5) LeBron James. Wasn't high on the technical list last year, but not for lack of trying. The Drama King does for "incredulity" what Eastwood did for the cold stare.
If the NBA adds another category for assessing technicals – "Getting fouled and dying like a cowboy in a bad western" -- James could be in serious trouble.
And how sad would that be?
HE SAID IT
"Players can go out and recruit, and coaches and GMs can't. These players obviously wanted to collude together and do this." -- Lakers coach Phil Jackson on James and Chris Bosh joining forces with Dwyane Wade.
Jackson smiled when he said "collude." He's a little unfamiliar with the true meaning of the word.
An entirely different word describes how the Lakers got Pau Gasol. "Larceny."
HE PICKED WHAT?
I'm often asked about my prognosticating skills.
Questions like, "Do you have any?"
Or this one just a few days ago from emailer Dustin P:
"Bud:
"How long will it be until the P.D. Browns picks are moved to the funny pages?"
But mostly people want to know if my prognosticating skills transfer beyond the world of sports. Seriously? What do you think?
My Top Non-Sports predictions over the years. I had:
• C-SPAN's "Women Lawyers and the Supreme Court" trouncing "American Idol" in the ratings.
• Dukakis!!!!
• Investment gold: the invisible dog leash
• Jimmy Dimora going down ... as the George Bailey of his day.
So, yes. My skills transfer.
SPINOFFS
Who is this man, and why does the PGA Tour expect fans to be excited about him?Now that Dimora is back on the job, for some reason I'm having a harder time getting outraged about Braylon Edwards being allowed to suit up Sunday after his Tuesday morning DWI...
Oregon State used 440 gallons of paint on one of its practice fields to replicate Boise State's blue field, the aerial view of which resembles an expanse of open water. In related news, the Oregon State Duck was badly injured in a diving accident...
Stevie Williams, Tiger Woods' combative caddy, was bumped off the charter flight for the Ryder Cup. Unfortunately for golf galleries scolded by Williams or having cameras tossed into a nearby lake by him, Williams was bumped off the flight before it left the ground...
Matt Kuchar came into Atlanta this week leading the FedEx Cup standings. It's a shame you can't bottle that kind of excitement...
The Forbes 400 list of the richest people in America includes one MLB owner (Arte Moreno of the Angels), one NBA owner (Mark Cuban) and 11 NFL owners. ... We interrupt this Forbes list to bring you a message from NFL owners claiming player salaries are driving them to the poor house...
YOU SAID IT
"Bud:
"After LeBron left the team, the Cavs' Mo Williams contemplated retirement, almost forfeiting $26 million left on his contract. Have you ever suffered from such despondency?" -- Regards, Tom Hoffner
No. At the PD only the editors are contemplating my retirement.
"Bud:
"I was channel surfing the other night and came across a promo for Tyler Perry's "Meet the Browns." Is that The CW and Rob Ryan's answer to Rex and HBO's "Hard Knocks"? -- Pat
No. In "Meet the Browns," the father of Brenda (Angela Bassett) dies before she gets a chance to meet him. The Browns' 2010 season doesn't die until the third week.
"Bud:
"I have another separated at birth for you. Jimi Hendrix and Joe Haden." -- Devin
Thanks for not saying me and every Hair Club for Men "before" picture.
"Bud:
"Former Browns' QBs Bruce Gradkowski and Derek Anderson will face each other as starters on Sunday in Arizona. Not exactly Sabathia vs. Lee in the World Series, but still worth noting." -- David, Shaker Heights
You're right. It's nothing like consecutive Cy Young winners matching up for new teams in the World Series. In fact, it's a statistical probability that every NFL game will feature an ex-Browns' quarterback -- but only if it doesn't feature two.
"Bud:
"Do Eric Mangini and his staff actually think that half-time adjustments are illegal, or does it just appear that way?" -- Jack, Lyndhurst
There could be that fear. I mean once you see innocent civic leaders in cuffs, it's understandable if everybody gets a little spooked about what constitutes a crime.
"Ho Bud:
"With so many changes in The Tribe this year, a team photo might be difficult. Could a group photo of the fans be done instead?" -- Bud Huston, Willoughby
Getting fans together for a picture could take some doing but let's try. You call six and I'll call the other six.
"Bud:
"Is it possible the PD misquoted Braylon Edwards when he said, 'Cleveland didn't understand my New York flair and swagger.' Shouldn't that read 'Flair and Stagger?" -- Eddie C., Parma Heights.
First-time "You Said It" winners receive a T-shirt from the Mental Floss collection.
"Hi Bud:
"Was Braylon Edwards' DWI arrest an inevitable result of 'The City That Never Sleeps' trading for 'The Receiver That Never Thinks'?" -- Bryan Fields
Repeat winners receive a fake Taliban beard just in time for Halloween.