Whatever hope there is for the Browns to someday soo win a Super Bowl can't be found in the story of the New York Giants, Bud Shaw writes in his Spin column.
Bill Kostroun, Associated PressThe confetti and cheers that Eli Manning (left), Zac DeOssie and the rest of the New York Giants experience on Tuesday was a deserved benefit of their Super Bowl championship. But Bud Shaw isn't a buyer when it comes to 9-7 teams having consistent playoff success. CLEVELAND, Ohio -- New York, New York, a team so unimpressive in 2011 they lost seven times...
The New York Giants aren't the greatest Super Bowl champ we've seen. Not close. They are, however, the most appropriate.
Thanks to labor strife, the 2011 season was a rush job. Who better to prevail than the first 9-7 Super Bowl winner in history, a team that spent most of the season looking like strangers stuck in an elevator together, a team that won it all in part because it overcame even more fumbling against the surprisingly skittish Patriots.
What helped the Giants in their own division is that the Philadelphia Eagles' "Dream Team" appeared to leave meetings at the team hotel and take 53 separate elevators to their rooms. I haven't seen that kind of chemistry since Britney married Jason Alexander.
Other firsts for a Super Bowl champ included being the first team to get outscored during the regular season, the first to suffer a four-game losing streak and the first to allow 400 points or more.
While the impulse might be for a Browns fan to think that just getting into the playoffs some year soon could bring the same kind of magic carpet ride, the 2011 season and the team that authored the turnaround are hardly a dependable barometer. In fact, instead of qualifying as an overachiever this season -- the theme of most underdog stories -- the Giants were blatant underachievers.
Can any team do what they did? Sure thing. Just so long as it has an elite quarterback, a Super Bowl-winning coach, a dominant four-man pass rush and the most underrated receiving corps in the league.
Oh, and recent Super Bowl experience.
The quarterback should also be able to direct seven game-winning drives as Eli Manning did. And it doesn't hurt if the Super Bowl opponent didn't beat a team with a .500 record until the AFC Championship game, as New England did in a narrow and fortunate defeat of Baltimore.
This was not a good NFL season by any stretch. An ESPN graphic noted last week that 34 games had a margin of 27 points or more. Players who gripe about mini-camps and offseason workouts should be made to watch the 2011 season in its entirety. The Browns weren't the only ones to suffer from a truncated off-season.
Looking toward next year, the Browns have more organizational cohesiveness than anytime since their rebirth. While that's not the highest praise, it's the reason for optimism in the absence of a franchise quarterback, big-play wide receivers and proven head coach.
It's not that there isn't hope. It's just not found in what the Giants did.
Anything except dancing to "Stayin' Alive" is permissible ...
Some Patriots fans are upset that tight end Rob Gronkowski was dancing like a shirtless maniac at the Patriots' post-Super Bowl team party. Others are angry with Tom Brady's wife for complaining publicly that his receivers let him down by dropping passes.
Just in case similar fan backlash toward reaching a Super Bowl but coming up short is what's holding the Browns back from embracing their destiny, let's make this perfectly clear in a memorandum of agreement between Browns fans and their team:
"Let it be stated that We The People don't care if the Browns lose a Super Bowl. In fact, players have expressed written consent to do nude chicken dances at the team party. As for the quarterback's wife, she can not only trash every last one of her husband's teammates, she can even scout the next combine for receiver help if she wants."
Just go.
Deal?
SPINOFFS
A Yahoo! Sports headline asks, "Should the Monday after the Super Bowl be a holiday?"
An obvious follow-up question: "Is it any wonder we'll never match the Chinese in work ethic? ..."
Denver running back Knowshon Moreno was charged with a DUI and for not carrying insurance. According to KDVR-31 TV in Denver, the vanity plate on the Bentley Moreno was driving read, "SAUCED."
What would Knowshon Moreno be doing if he didn't play football, you ask? Look, there's no guarantee he'd be the Tennessee man I read about recently who was arrested on drunk driving and child endangerment charges when his 10-year old son wrecked his car. Cops found the sloshed father in the passenger seat wearing a T-shirt that read, "Buy this dad a beer..."
And there's no guarantee he wouldn't be...
After Blake Griffin's recent monster dunk on Oklahoma City big man Kendrick Perkins, LeBron James called it the "Dunk of the Year!" in a tweet, adding, "Wow! I guess I'm No. 2 now. Move over #6."
Because, you know, it was all about him...
Said a riled up Perkins about James' tweet, "You don't see Kobe [Bryant] tweeting. ... If you're an elite player, plays like that don't excite you. At the end of the day, the guys who are playing for the right reasons who are trying to win championships are not worrying about one play.
"They also are not tweeting about themselves talking about going down to No. 2. I just feel [James] is always looking for attention and he wants the world to like him..."
Best take ever on James from a rival player. I don't know how Kendrick Perkins would look in a Cavs' uniform, but he'd sound good in one.
Reason No. 2 to appreciate Perkins: He said he wouldn't think twice about trying to block Griffin again in the same situation: "A lot of people are afraid of humiliation or don't know how to handle embarrassment ... I don't care," he said.
A high tolerance for humiliation and embarrassment is something I've always admired in Cleveland sports fans.
AP fileHe may not have triumphed Down Under, but at least he doesn't need reality TV girlfriends.
HE SAID IT
"Two nights ago over 111 million people saw the New York Giants cancel the Brady Bunch." -- Giants' co-owner Steve Tisch at the victory parade, no doubt on his way to a killer set at Hilarities.
HE SAID IT, TOO
"I cannot believe how bad the NBA is right now." -- Charles Barkley, who might want to think about coming up with a different message when he pretends to be excited about picking players for one of the "Rising Stars" rosters for the NBA All-Star weekend.
SEPARATED AT BIRTH
Rafael Nadal and Ben Flajnik (The Bachelor) -- Jackie Rangel
YOU SAID IT
AP file"Love" isn't just a tennis term for failure for this guy. (The Expanded Mid-week Edition)
"Bud:
"How did Pat Shurmur talk Bill Belichick into letting him coach the first quarter of the Super Bowl for the Patriots?" -- Michael Sarro
Clearly, he must've agreed to return the favor next February.
"Hey Bud:
"Did your wife ever publicly complain that you can't be expected to write your column and read it too?" -- Bob H., Medina
Only on Thursdays when I'm heckled by family and Sundays when I'm heckled by friends.
"Bud:
"I guess a NFL team practice needs to include how not to score." -- Richard Ellers
I think that seed was planted during Camp Colt.
"Bud:
"Did you pull a muscle reaching for your squares sheet after the Super Bowl began with a safety?" -- Joe S
I've made a long and dedicated commitment to having no muscles to pull.
"Bud:
"What do you think Belichick's reaction will be when Brady comes to training camp and suggests the Patriots run the Wildcat so he can throw and catch?" -- Edward Aube, Broadview Heights
Having seen Brady outside the pocket over the years, I think if he insists Belichick will call 9-1-1.
"Bud:
"If 'Shaw's Spin' ever needs a Vice President of Strategic Engagement, I'm your man. I bet I'd be really good at whatever that is." -- Ignatowski
Thank you for not assuming the only strategy involved in the writing of Spin is whiskey before beer.
"Hey Bud:
"NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell said that given the poor play on the field and the active booing in the stands they may consider doing away with the Pro Bowl. As a Browns fan, should we be worried they're next?" -- Nate Johnson, Brunswick
First-time "You Said It" winners receive a T-shirt from the Mental Floss collection. Repeat winners get jeered.
On Twitter: @budshaw